TGIF? Screw that April 17, 2009

How is it even possible to be grumpy on a Friday? Seriously World, congratulations, you’ve totally outdone yourself. Making this happen is as low as you could bloody well go.

 

Thank you for the nightmares last night, really you shouldn’t have.

 

Thanks ever so much for speaking with my mp3 player to redefine what “shuffling” means. For future reference any Philips products owners out there – it means pick two albums and alternate a track from each. Don’t even change the order. Stupid technology, I failed computer science repeatedly and even I could write more complicated code than that.

 

Also thankyou for sending out the truck that sweeps roads to drive really loudly and slowly beside me all the way to work, really appreciated it.

 

Thanks for changing the sequence on the pedestrian lights outside the office so I had to wait for twice as long while the cars got another go. Two of my favourite things, waiting and being discriminated against.

 

Thanks for messing with the the cleaning lady’s head so she didn’t empty my bin (just MY bin) yesterday evening so I can see how much crap I ate for lunch yesterday. Nothing nicer than seeing empty crisp packets and coke bottles to make you feel like a heifer.

 

Cmon then, what’s next?

cookie monster February 27, 2009

IT’S FRIDAY, Fridays make me happy. There are no more sleeps till the weekend cause it IS the weekend. Also Friday means that tomorrow is Saturday. And Saturday is biscuit day! Bicuits make me happy, worryingly happy. If I had a choice between lots of fabulous humongous bags and a pack of biscuits (nice biscuits now I’m talking big half dunked chocolate and peanut cookies) I think I’d go for the biscuits!!!! Although if I had lots of fabulous humongous bags, I would probably fill them with biscuits anyway and hand them out to people in need of biscuity goodness, like some sort of cookie monster , but nice and not blue.

Casual Friday February 26, 2009

Tomorrow is casual Friday. I love it.

My colleague has the most incredible body I have ever seen in person. When I am near him, I feel faint in the Jane Austen sense. On Fridays, he wears tight, fitted T-shirts that show his incredibly toned pecs and arms. His apparel puts pep in my step. Sometimes he wears a white hoodie. I’ve never seen a hoodie look so sexy on anyone.

I’ve decided what I want to be when I grow up. When I grow up, I want to be that hoodie.